Darkwing Duck - High Wave Robbery (Cassette & Storybook)

Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know. I've been gone for a llllllllllloooooooonnnnnnggggggg time. 

But don't blame me! If anything, you should blame love... and whiskey... and Mai Tais...

Anywhoo, now that that's all over, I can finally get back to what really matters in my life — pants baskets! Uhhh... I mean BLOGGING!!

Today's magical blog of magicalness is the Darkwing Duck cassette and storybook, High Wave Robbery!

As you can see from the super groovy cover, this is an action packed thrill ride with motorcycles and fire and smoke and crazy-eyed Launchpads!

Well actually, it's just an episode of Darkwing Duck that wasn't good enough to actually be animated.

Also, I don't remember having FREE TRADING CARDS INSIDE... I feel gypped.

I enjoy this thing a whole heck of a lot. I can't even count how many times I've listened to this tape in my life. As a kid, I was OBSESSED with this thing. And to be perfectly honest, I still am.

The story concerns an evil supervillian named Frequencia who uses crazy loud sounds, or frequencies (GENIUS), to put people into a daze, and rob them while they are stuck in said daze. Darkwing Duck, of course, comes to save the day and... well, he saves the day. What else would he do?

It's a pretty awesome story.

Also, there's lots of puns. Like the names "Mrs. Rockefeather" and "Mooselangelo".

God, I love animal related puns.

Frequencia is a pretty cool lookin' supervillian too, if you ask me. I would've loved to see her in animated action, robbing people at movie premieres and art galleries! Dangit, Disney! Just start the Disney Afternoon all over again! I promise I'll pretend like the last 19 years of Disney Afternoon withdrawal never happened!

This episode ends with a BLORT — one of my favorite onomatopoeias. 

Yep. I sure do love BLORTs.

The voice acting on this story is obviously super awesome, as it includes all of the original cast from the TV show — Jim Cummings, Terrance McGovern, and Christine Cavanaugh.

The narration is great too... God, I wish I sounded as cool as William Woodson! I mean, he was the narrator for the All-New Super Friends Hour!!

Also, he dubbed someone in Brian De Palma's Bonfire of the Vanities, not that that matters, or anything... even though Brian De Palma has recently become my second favorite director of all time... but that's for another post altogether.

Let's just say that I've watched Body Double 16 times in the past four months, and leave it at that... at least for now...

Oh boy.

ANYWAYS, you can download the Darkwing Duck cassette and storybook of High Wave Robbery HERE!

And, as always, you can CLICK on the photo(s) to enable the ENLARGE-O-MATIC™ PHOTO EMBIGGENER®!!

Enjoy!

The Darkwing Duck Buttons/Pins (Part 2)

Welcome to PART 2, and the last part of the Darkwing Duck pins/buttons/what-have-you!

First off, we've got your basic Disney Channel promo pin. Wow. Exciting.

Second, we've got a Megavolt pin! This one rules.

STORYTIME!! One time, I ran into Dan Castellaneta at a movie theater, and when I talked to him, I told him my favorite character of his was Megavolt and he got all freaked out, because everybody is all "HOMER SIMPSON" at him all the time. He spoke in Megavolt's voice at me and asked me politely to "shut up, dimbulb". It was AWESOME.

Next up, we've got a Disney Club pin from France! Why is he called Myster Mask in France? I have no idea.

Last, but certainly not least, we have the amazing, super cool, and super rare Double O Duck pin! Now, you may be saying to yourself, "Wait a gosh darn minute. This is supposed to be Darkwing Duck pins/buttons/what-have-you! Not Double O Duck, whoever the heck that is! I demand an apology, good sir!" Well guess what... YOU'RE WRONG!! Double O Duck is the original Darkwing Duck!! KAPOW!!

Apparently the "Double O" term is a copyright of the people who own the James Bond franchise, and wouldn't let Disney use the "Double O" in their character's name. Either that, or they charged too much. I'm okay with that.

This is a really, really early (and kind of weird) design of the character, and he's obviously based off the model sheet for Donald Duck... even though the show was originally conceived as a spinoff of a DuckTales episode with the title "Double O Duck", starring the Launchpad character. Confusing, I know.

This pin was originally given out at a press conference/stockholder event for Disney, where they were promoting all their new shows in development. All I can say is THANK GOD they changed the character to Darkwing Duck.

If you're so inclined, you can watch the "Double O Duck" episode of DuckTales below!!

The Darkwing Duck Buttons/Pins (Part 1)

And so here we are, falling back into the abyss of my gigantronomic Darkwing Duck collection, with the first part of my accumulation of DW related buttons/pins/what-have-you.

First off, we've got your generic "time-to-promote-the-show-oh-crap-what-do-we-do-okay-here's-an-idea-let's-make-buttons" button. Cool.

Next, we've got a button from the Disneyland Hotel, which has these Character Dinners where you go eat dinner at the hotel and then Disney characters periodically interrupt your dinner and attack you and force you to take pictures with them while you are trying to take a bite out of your club sandwich.

I always liked this model/version of Darkwing Duck. They used it a lot in the old 90s Marvel Comic Books. For some unknown reason though, in this button version, Darkwing is wearing a Pilgrim hat. Alrighty then.

And last, but not least, the Launchpad McQuack button. Because hey, why not?

Stay tuned for even more, rarer, cooler, awesomer, and radicaler Darkwing Duck button/pin thingamajigs!!

Article #794158 - The Darkwing Duck Watch

Today's item is one of my all-time favorite things - the Darkwing Duck watch.

I can't believe someone would want a Rolex when a watch like this exists.

I've probably had 5 of these watches over the past 20 years, destroying every single one of them from overuse. I just love these things with a firey passion. I stopped wearing them a couple years ago, just because I couldn't stand the thought of killing any more!

Poor mutilated DW watch...

See?! It's terribly sad to see my old Darkwing Duck watch like that... the tears are coming!!

Besides the super coolness of the watch, the art for the box is pretty awesome too! I wish they would make stuff like this again. Oh well, I guess.

A REAL WATCH

Enjoy, and don't forget to be careful when you're getting dangerous!

Article #32127 - The Darkwing Duck Scripts (Part 4 of 4)

Well, here we are at the end of the Darkwing Duck script collection. Lucky for you, though, we have barely even scratched the surface of my Darkwing Duck collection! Oh yes.

Today's script is for one of the best episodes of the entire series, "The Darkwing Squad". In this episode, J. Gander Hooter decides that Darkwing needs to train S.H.U.S.H.'s best (aka nerdiest) agents to be more like the daringly dashing Darkwing. Of course, Gryzlikoff hates this idea, but if we let him be the boss of this whole operation, then we wouldn't have this episode, which would lead to not having this script, which would lead to not having this blog entry!

*GASP*

Thank God Gryzlikoff isn't in charge.

For the rest of the episode, while Darkwing trains the bumbling agents, the evil supervillian Steelbeak takes advantage of Gryzlikoff's anger at the situation to recruit him to F.O.W.L. for his prolific plot against humanity! Of course, then it's The Darkwing Squad to the rescue!

Oh, by the way, The Darkwing Squad contains Darkwing Donkey, Darkwing Dog, Darkwing Deer, and Darkwing Dodo.

Woo hoo!

Wait… that's DuckTales… Uh, LET'S GET DANGEROUS!!

Yeah, that's right.

Unfortunately, unlike Dirty Money, this script doesn't have a storybook based on it. Sadness. But, fortunately for us all, the episode is available on the second volume of Darkwing Duck DVDs. YIPEE!

Orrrrr you can watch it below!

Download the script for "The Darkwing Squad" HERE.

Enjoy!

Article #32125 & 6 - The Darkwing Duck Scripts (Part 3 of 4) & Storybook

I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the script-owning scourge that squeegees my way into your soul! I am.... DARKWIIIIINNNNGGG DUCK!

Well, not really, but that was my half-assed attempt at being as awesome as the Darkwing Duck writers. Anywhoo, welcome to part THREE of my collection of Darkwing Duck scripts!

Today's script is entitled "Dirty Money" and features one of the rarest (and strangest) Darkwing Duck villains ever - the F.O.W.L. neat freak, Ammonia Pine. Puns are awesome.

In this episode, the evil Ammonia Pine (who turned to evil after "an accident with an experimental bathroom disinfectant") is breaking into banks, literally cleaning out the vaults by removing the ink off the dollar bills. Oh, and not even 10 pages in, and she sucks the head of S.H.U.S.H., J. Gander Hooter, up into her vacuum. I love it.

This, of course, leaves Gryzlikoff in charge, annoying Darkwing to no end - especially when Gryzlikoff runs him through an insane amount of "training". Cue the hilarious sitcom-type humor!

This episode was also turned into a kid's storybook, which I also own... obviously. The book has the slightly, yet completely different title of "Clean Money". Freakin' genius.

You can download the PDF of the "Dirty Money" script HERE.

This episode is available on Vol. 1 of the Darkwing Duck DVDs, ooooorrrrrrrrr you can watch it below!

Enjoy!

Article #32124 - The Darkwing Duck Scripts (Part 2 of 4)

Today is the 20th anniversary of the premiere of Darkwing Duck. I remember coming home from school every day, running straight to the TV and turning on the Disney Afternoon to watch my favorite show. I credit Darkwing Duck with being the biggest influence on my sense of humor, and even as I still watch it today, I laugh just like I did when I was 6 years old. I still love it, and I still miss it. Also, I feel really, really old.

Today, I bring you the second of the four Darkwing Duck scripts. This one's from the episode "Disguise the Limit". In this episode, Darkwing gets ZAPPED by another one of Dr. Sara Bellum's (puns!) ray guns, which makes Darkwing transform over and over into duplicates of other people, including this week's villain, NEGADUCK!! Hilarity ensues!

Download the "Disguise the Limit" script HERE!

This episode is available on the second volume of Darkwing Duck DVDs, buuut if you don't have it, check it out below!

Article #32123 - The Darkwing Duck Scripts (Part 1 of 4)

Today, we've got the first of my collection of four Darkwing Duck scripts. I purchased these teleplays about a year ago, from eBay, just thinking they were another awesome thing to add to my always growing Darkwing Duck collection. Little did I know, these scripts belonged to Ron Feinberg, the voice of S.H.U.S.H. (the secret spy organization Darkwing sometimes worked for) agent Grizzlikof!

Ron Feinberg was a character actor who, before moving to voice acting primarily, guest starred on many classic shows, such as Mission: Impossible, Hawaii Five-O, and the classically forgotten caveman sitcom, It's About Time!

All four of these scripts are obviously Grizzlikof-featuring episodes, and in fact are some of my favorites. Today's script is for "Bad Tidings", a Batman meets I Love Lucy style episode where Grizzlikof and Darkwing have to put their differences aside to stop Steelbeak (my favorite Darkwing Duck villain) and his evil organization F.O.W.L. (the Fiendish Organization for World Larceny) from conquering the world with their tidal wave machine. Yep. A TIDAL WAVE MACHINE. God, I love cartoons.

DOWNLOAD THE PDF OF THE "BAD TIDINGS" SCRIPT HERE

Sadly, this episode isn't available on DVD (YET!!), but here's the YouTube links to watch as you read along!

Enjoy!

Article #457 - The Darkwing Duck Bus Sign

"I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the batteries that are not included! I am Darkwiiiiiinnnng Duck!"

Today we have something extremely rare and super awesome - The Darkwing Duck Bus Sign.

As I've said before, I believe I have the world's largest Darkwing Duck collection, and if you don't believe me after seeing this, then you are in denial and must consult your local therapist.

Now if I know you (and I think I do), you must think I'm crazy because I own a bus sign. A Darkwing Duck bus sign, no less. But don't worry! As far as I know it was never actually ON a bus. So, maybe I'm not as insane as you may think. Or maybe I am...? Dun dun DUNNNNNNNNN. The plot thickens!

The thing that makes this so ultimately groovalicious to me though, is that it is a full size (5 feet x 2 feet) bus sign and signed by the voice of Darkwing and voice over god, Jim Cummings!

ENJOY!

CLICK on the photo to enable the ENLARGE-O-MATIC PHOTO EMBIGGENER®!!

Article #321 - The Darkwing Duck Mask

In my first post, I claimed to have the largest Darkwing Duck collection in the known universe. I assure you, I am not kidding.

Even as my taste in films and television has changed, Darkwing Duck has always been one show that I can watch and always find hilarious. As a child, I laughed at the all of the Batman references and classic Looney Tunes-esque cartoon humor. As an adult, I've discovered that it is quite possibly the funniest and most cleverly written cartoon of all time. Here are 2 examples:

Example #1 In what other kid's cartoon would you hear any villain utter the diabolically decadent line "If the neo-postmodernist backlash hadn't caught pre-antirealism in it's wake you'd be sitting pretty!"?

Example #2 In what other kid's show would you see an episode completely dedicated to be a parody of David Lynch's Twin Peaks entitled "Twin Beaks" complete with a villain "dead, wrapped in plastic", 100s of "log ladies", and title sequence parody?

Seriously, it's my favorite show of all time, and ever since Darkwing Duck premiered in 1991, I've had an unhealthy obsession with all things DW. Luckily for me, my mom and grandmother supported the heck out of this obsession. I literally own everything and by everything, I mean EVERY-FREAKING-THING Darkwing Duck related. Some are really awesome and some are just plain weird and obsessive-like. This is one of those weird and obsessive ones.

In 1993, the Disney Afternoon was at the height of its popularity. There was Ducktales, TaleSpin, Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers, Gummi Bears, and of course (in my humble opinion) the best one of all, Darkwing Duck. And it was pretty dang popular, I mean there were action figures, watches, video games, underwear, t-shirts, shorts, fanny packs, cereal boxes, board games, lunchboxes, video tapes, trading cards, collectible stickers... basically everything that you can milk out of a kid's television show was taken advantage of. That same year, there was the unforgettable Disney Afternoon on Iceshow. There weren't too many shows, and if you try Googling it, you won't find anything. No pictures, no merchandise, no programs - NOTHING!!

One night, my dad came home from work and picked up my mom, my friend Christa, and I and surprised us by taking us to the Disney Afternoon on Ice. The only thing I really remember from the actual show is seeing DW as he skated by, and waving to me, and as awesome as that memory may be, it's definitely not as cool as this semi-creepy Darkwing Duck mask sold only at the very few shows that were put on by the Disney Afternoon on Ice.

I DARE you to find another one of these on the interweb. You can't. I assure you.

I leave you now with a hilariously bad-yet-great cover of the Darkwing Duck theme song.