Today's thing of interest to nobody else but me is the comic book novelization of my favorite late 60s weird-ass Disney film, Blackbeard's Ghost!
Magical, isn't it?
Well anyways, since I've talked wayyyyyy too much about this movie before, I won't go into the whole detail of the synopsis of the film again, so we'll talk about this crazy comic book!
For some reason, the comic book starts off with a scene that takes place about 15 minutes into the film and then flashbacks to the beginning. Confusarama!
Also, why does Dean Jones' cartoon character version look nothing like him, and exactly like Generic White Guy #993842?
So, the story continues and there's some great panels that show people narrating while something confusing is happening to them -- like this motorcycle cop who is being attacked by the drunken ghost of Blackbeard.
Help! I forgot to take my anti-psychotic medication
and now I can't stop narrating!
Then, randomly a couple pages later, there is a 3 page break in the story for some odd pieces of confusingness that have nothing to do with anything regarding Blackbeard's Ghost! My favorite of these things, though, is this page entitled Jest for Fun, featuring a happy picture of a an overpopulated barrel of monkeys and a bunch of 2-3 line jokes that apparently weren't good enough for a popsicle stick.
And now back to our regularly scheduled program...
So then we are thrown violently back into the story and into a crazy race where Blackbeard is screwing around with everything and helping Godolphin win so that an illegal bet that was made can be collected to help fund an old ladies' hotel. Yippee!!
Soooooo, they win the race and the guy who runs the illegal gambling parlor who took the illegal bet on the illegal race from the illegal ghost of Blackbeard decides to not pay them their money... which is illegal!
So the illegal ghost of Blackbeard and Dean Jones and Suzanne Pleshette rush over to the illegal gambling hall and attempt to get their illegal winnings from the illegal Silky Seymour!
And in all the illegal hubbub, this happens...
This is my favorite comic book panel of all time. Just pure genius.
So anyways, as you can guess, everything happens in favor of the ghost of Blackbeard and Dean Jones and Godolphin college and the old ladies' hotel thing, so we have our patented Disney happy ending.
Oh, and then we top it all off with this frightening advertisement for Golden Magazine.
Is Cracky on crack? Tune in next week to find out!
You can download the Blackbeard's Ghost comic book HERE!