Today we've got everybody's favorite random and completely unheard of magazine In The Know's issue for January 1976, featuring a Special Report on The 18 Most Important Celebrities of 1975! "Far out!", as John Denver might say.
As you can see, they've included lots of "important" celebrities up there on the cover. There's James Caan, Henry Kissinger, Cher, Robert Redford, Gerald and Betty Ford, Warren "Ishtar/Shampoo" Beatty, and, my favorite two, Patty Hearst and Jaws the Shark. As you all know, the exploits of Jaws and Patty Hearst are the reason why we made it through the 70's. All the mainstream History books leave that part out, for some unknown reason.
This is a pretty fun magazine, and besides the cover article, there's a few really interesting Beach Boys related articles, one including some groovy backstage pictures of them on tour. Another article is about the (annoying) Captain and Tennille, who started out as back-up vocalists for the Beach Boys. Lastly, there's an article about Stan Love, the 6' 9" basketball playing brother of Mike Love. On a related note, Mike Love is a stupid McJerkypants-Butt.
There's also a section in this magazine where certain celebrities talk about what Christmas is to them, including a tiny anecdote by comedy god Groucho Marx.
Another part of the Christmas section asks certain 70's super celebrities what they want for Christmas. My personal favorite comes from Pat Loud, the mom from An American Family - the first "reality show"/greatest 12-part documentary ever made.
The only thing that could have made that any better was if she used the word "cesspool". Oh well...
Of course all of these articles are pretty important to humanity, but the one that most epitomizes the everlasting fight against the Communists is this article...
YES!! BELLY DANCING!! You can't go wrong with Melaina Blume, the US Belly Dancing Champion of 1975. She is belly dancing for your freedom! AMERICA! Oh, how I love it.
And that, my friends, is the In The Know magazine for January 1976. In my experience, I find that it's always a good idea to know what was most important exactly 31 years ago. Especially if that 31 years ago was 1975.
Enjoy, and please try not to forget the 1970's. They obviously were the greatest decade in human history.
Download the In The Know magazine HERE.
Oh, and don't forget to visit In The Know magazine's crazy awesome and super futuristic website!